Holidays and Birthdays

It was Christmas morning, and I had nothing to open.  Nothing in my stocking, either.  It was then and there that I decided Something Needed To Change.  It's not that my husband didn't give me anything: he had come home from the store the day before and deposited my Christmas gift, visible through its translucent gray Wal-Mart bag, on the floor in view of all.  It was a space heater; a very thoughtful gift actually, since my old trusty one that I had kept in my bathroom since I was 15 (!) bit the dust the week before.  But it was the lack of ceremony that did me in.  No attempt made to keep it a secret, wrap it up, and watch my face as I opened it.  Just there it was on the floor.  In a Wal-Mart bag.  Don't misread me.  I'm THANKFUL.  I've used that new heater almost every single day since he "gave" it to me.  But there is something to be said for a little bit of fanfare, a little bit of flourish or mystery in gift-giving. Something to make the receiver of the gift feel special.

Then I got to thinking: when was the last time I sent a card to anyone in my extended family for their birthday?  Or gave them something for Christmas?  Or communicated to them that I love them and that they are valuable to me?  I'm just as guilty as Josh!

And so it is with great excitement that we embark on a new adventure in our family: learning how to be thoughtful and give gifts.  Some of you are excellent at this--you know the perfect gift or thoughtful gesture that would just make someone's day.  It does not come naturally for me (or my husband).  That just means I will have to put a little more thought in and try.  Josh and I were talking about this the other day; that the pressure of not knowing just exactly what to give keeps us from giving because we don't want to fail.  Well this year, we want to be willing to fail if it means we tried.

Comments

Ruth said…
I think it's important to make family traditions related to holidays. That was emphasized in a book I read by Noel Piper (Treasuring God in our Traditions) - she's the daughter of John Piper if you've read any of his books. I think birthdays, holidays, and vacations are the memories that are the strongest from my childhood. I am trying to develop more traditions related to our family celebrations also. Didn't Noah get you anything? I know it was very important to Nadia that she got something for Ian, Oliver, Mommy, and Daddy for Christmas. Maybe you could take the boys shopping for little gifts for Josh next year and he could take them shopping for gifts for you. It is nice to buy gifts for extended family although it's also easy for that to get out of control. I buy birthday and CHristmas gifts for every sister, brother, brother in-law, sister-in-law, niece, nephew, mom, dad, etc. which adds up to quite a few people.
January 13, 2013 at 6:36 PM
cj and family said…
Sounds like a good change is coming. :) May I make a suggestion? ... start simple. :) Maybe plan ONE special thing (connecting it with your meal plan is nice because eating always has to happen, so it's fairly simple to follow through on) per holiday. Keep notes, and then next year, you can add something else small. Don't feel as though you need to make huge changes all at once. I'll message you one other suggestion. :)
January 14, 2013 at 6:14 PM
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