My Ebenezer

Hi folks, it's me again with another IVF update.  I realize this blog has turned into IVF Central lately, but it's kind of on my mind these days.  Understatement of the year.  I hope to bring you more varied content soon, but for now I'm on this roller-coaster, so I might as well put my hands up and ride!  If you know me in real life, you know that white-knuckling it is more my style on roller coasters.  Or better yet, not even getting on at all. :) At my appointment this morning, I had a small change of plans.  The egg retrieval is still scheduled for Tues (that's TOMORROW!!), but the embryo transfer will now likely be on Sunday.  I had assumed that it would be a 3-day transfer like I had before (which would be Friday), but it turns out Dr. W. favors 5-day transfers.  You learn something new every day. SO.  Barring unforeseen circumstances, my transfer should be Sunday unless you hear differently from me on Thursday, which is a real poss...

I got a call from my IVF clinic today, and was informed that the egg retrieval would be on Tuesday, Lord-willing.  This will probably mean an embryo transfer on Friday, but I'll keep you posted to be sure.  In the meantime, would you join me in praying for the "right" number of eggs (God knows how many that is) to be retrieved and mature into embryos?  Thanks a million!

We're coming to the crest of the hill on this IVF cycle.  My shots have been going well (as well as shots can go! I wouldn't recommend self-administered shots, just in case you were wondering), and the patches aren't too bad either, with the exception of being exceedingly itchy.  Praise the Lord, my emotions and crazy thoughts and dreams have been much tamer (more tame? Grammar, anyone?) this week as well, which I attribute to the prayers of so many of you.  Thank you for praying!!! I heard from our nurse this afternoon, and she said it's looking like the egg retrieval will be either Tues or Wed (the 28th or 29th).  We'll know which one by Monday, Lord-willing.  If you have been praying for us, please continue!  I am getting very excited, and hope and pray and pray and hope that God will use this to grow our family.

Today has been VERY windy.  Must be a cold front moving through or something.  Anyway, here's my conversation with Noah on the way across the parking lot from school to our car: Me:  "Wow, it's really windy out here today, Noah!  Did you blow away on the playground today?" Noah:  "No.  It's a good thing God made us so heavy, isn't it?  So we don't blow away!"

Some have been asking me how I feel these days, and what IVF is like to go through.  In a word, it's Intense.  While I'm feeling physically fine now that I'm off those  yucky pills , emotionally and spiritually things have begun to heat up. IVF creates the perfect storm of obsession.  You take a couple who have been trying for years to have a baby, include all their stalled hopes and dreams and plans, add a rigorous and exacting time schedule which must be synchronized and followed perfectly, throw in several dozen self-administered hormone shots (which mess with your emotions), and make it cost thousands of dollars (no pressure to have it work or anything!  If it works, it was the best money we could have spent.  If not?  Well, we don't even want to think about that right now...), and you pretty much have the recipe for Obsession  IVF in a nutshell. I find myself praying over this cycle almost every waking minute.  Which I guess is goo...

Playing the piano has become for me a retreat of sorts; a mini-vacation and a mental relaxer.  This morning as I was practicing, I played through the hymn "Redeemed, How I Love To Proclaim It" and was encouraged by one of the verses, which has been repeating constantly through my head ever since: "I know I shall see in His beauty the King in whose law I delight, who lovingly guardeth my footsteps and giveth me songs in the night." I will see Him one day--the One who has taken perfect care of me throughout my earthly life! Amen!

Ever have one of those days you wish you could do over?  Valentine's Day was like that for me.  I spaced on getting valentines for Noah's classmates, and as a result he was one of the only kids who didn't give them out.  He didn't notice this oversight at all, but I blushed when he brought home a giant sack of candy and cards from his classmates.  Oops. And I had made the colossal mistake last Sunday of verbally downplaying the importance of Valentine's Day in front of Josh, and so when Josh came home on Valentine's Day bearing a single stem with 4 very small roses on it, thinking he had sufficiently fulfilled his romantic duty, I was under-enthused.  That's putting it too  kindly.  I was a selfish brat about it, and I hurt his feelings.  Honest much? :)  Really, the flower he chose is very pretty, and I am so thankful now, but I wasn't at the time.  To my shame and embarrassment, it was not one of my shining moments. God reminded...

Daisy came into our lives quite unexpectedly almost 3 weeks ago.  We were walking in to church (we meet at a community club house), and were met by three kittens--"teenage cats" as Noah called them--who were the friendliest things I'd ever seen.  The manager said they had been dropped off there and abandoned by someone that week, and he had been feeding them.  He said that they were free to anyone who wanted them. I taught my Sunday School class outside that day, and the three little children could barely concentrate on the lesson, because these cats kept coming up and rubbing on them and purring.  Seriously, folks, what cat in its right mind is friendly to 3 kids ages 4 and under?  I rest my case.  These clearly had to be The Friendliest Cats In The World.  I was smitten, and by the end of the morning, we had decided to take one home. Now why did we name her Daisy?  Earlier that week, I had sent some daisies to my mom to cheer her up in the...

Driving in the car the other day, Noah was trying to point out a truck that had blaring music emanating from its orifices.  He said, "See Mommy? It's that burgundy one over there."  Okay, I didn't even know he knew what burgundy was.  I looked over in the direction he was pointing.  Yep, it was dark red, all right.  Wow. At lunch today, Noah was telling me about his playground accomplishments.. "And I can even hang upside-down on the monkey bars by my leg pits!"  That may be the funniest thing I heard all day.  Leg pits!  This guy kills me!

**If you are a male or otherwise squeamish around IVF talk, I would strongly encourage you to come back another day.  Or go read the posts labeled "Noah."  Those'll be safe.** I've been trying to tell myself that IVF is more than a shot in the dark with God on our side.  That's not to say that it WILL work, but that is to say that if God wills it to work, it WILL work.  And that's comforting.  I also just had to have a title with the word "shot" in it, because tomorrow morning, Lord-willing, I begin taking the first of many shots.  I received a call from the IVF nurse this past Monday, informing me of our tentative IVF schedule. Keep in mind, this is TENTATIVE, with almost anything subject to change. Feb 10  Stop taking yucky birth control pill.  Start Lupron shots (in upper leg) every morning for 7 days.  I will be giving myself these shots, and really these are not that bad.  The worst part is the moment just before the need...

You may remember that Noah has already recited 1 Thess 5:18  when he was 2.  But like the rest of us, our memory verses need to be revisited.  This became abundantly clear when it came time to say his verse in church and he said it with a pouty face and anything BUT a thankful spirit.  To have this move beyond an exercise, beyond rote memory into application to his life--that's the goal for him AND for us!  We keep working...

I didn't forget my husband's birthday, as much as he might have wanted to.  He turned 32 on January 30.  We had quite a bit of company, and celebrated with a steak dinner (thanks, Aunt Dorene!), and chocolate raspberry cake for dessert. I am so thankful for another year of life for my husband.  I love you more and more, Honeybear! (Spell-checker just underlined "Honeybear" in red.  There, it did it again.  I'm sorry, Spell-checker, Honeybear is indeed a word, and it IS spelled correctly!  Go pick on some other word that's misspelled for real.) Happy Birthday!!

For the last 10 days, we have had Josh's parents staying with us as they work on some houses down here and visit the grandkids.  And us.  (Have you ever noticed that's how it goes once you have kids?  Your parents say something like, "I can't wait to see Noah!  And you.")  We didn't see much of Grampy, because he was out and about a lot.  I think he'll need a vacation when he goes home. :)  But we did manage to take Grammy to the zoo, and here are some photos from that day: Waiting to get our bracelets for the train Oddly I don't remember this photo being taken.   On the train!  Noah positively loves the train, but we seldom ride. Jen and Libby.  Or is that Brianne from a few years ago?  Tough to tell. :) Grammy and Titus The 3 big kids We met up with a family from our church.  Noah and Mark are best buds.  Bradley kids and Rowley kids What a fun day! The weather has...

Noah and I were making cookies yesterday.  Noah asked if he could crack the egg, which I had no problem with.  But then I heard, "Oops!"  He had completely missed the dish, and cracked the egg right onto the counter top. Oops is right!  We both had a good laugh about that one.