The Whole Truth
But sooner or later, 8 weeks later to be exact, it's time for those kittens to go. At that time we will put an ad on Craigslist and find homes for each and every one. This brings the fun hassle of sending people additional pictures, telling them again how much we are charging (that was in the ad!), setting up potential meetings with people who will ghost at the last minute, after we've already given them our address. Everyone should put an ad on Craigslist at least once just for the experience.
Should you finally get someone who likes the look of a kitten, wants to pay the price, can meet at an agreeable time, successfully finds your house, is okay with the fact that the kittens haven't had their shots and have lived effectively outside for the last 4 weeks, you praise the Lord and say goodbye to the sweet kitten.
Well, the other day we were down to our last one and had jumped through all the hoops listed above. We had a couple standing in our driveway cuddling this kitten (I should say the lady was cuddling it; her husband looked as though he didn't want to be there). Everything was going to plan.
And then.
Hesitantly, the wife asks, "Has she had her shots?"
I say, "No, she hasn't yet. But that's why we don't charge much for the rehoming fee." I pray that this won't be a deal-killer.
And for whatever reason, Eden decides now is the time to pipe up in her loudest, clearest voice ever, "She has fleas!"
And I need to tell you, in that moment that word "fleas," though it is only one syllable long, was drawn out and magnified as though she had borrowed a megaphone and made the announcement from a rooftop. It hung there in space for a second and reverberated. It was tangible.
F L E A S. FLEAS. Fleas. f l e a s. fleas.
I was gutted. I couldn't look at Eden. I was afraid I'd betray my shock and horror and further verify her pronouncement.
The lady, who had been snuggling this kitten up until now, withdrew it from her chest as though Eden had said “leprosy” and said, "Oh, no. She does?"
I stammered lamely, "Well, she probably does, since she's been in our garage for a few weeks, spending a lot of her time outside. It's very likely." I was preparing to take the kitten back, thank these people for their time, and head back inside to text the next interested person, when a miracle happened.
The lady began examining the cat's fur, combing through it with her fingers and squinting. "I don't see any fleas," she said. "So if she has them, she certainly doesn't have very many. And anyway, that's nothing a little Dawn dish soap can't fix."
Wait, what? You could have scraped me off the floor. Before I knew what was happening, she was handing me money and taking the kitten, fleas and all, home with her! I could have hugged her.
And all the way back inside the house with the money in my pocket, this phrase was repeating in my brain, "the whole truth and nothing but the truth."
So help me, God. :)
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