Love Hate

I'm 9 days into a Whole 30 .  You can click that link if you want to know more about it.  Meanwhile, this is me, desperately craving bread/chocolate/cheese/coffee creamer, and not getting any of it.  Hating my life and loving it all at the same time.  Because, while I can't have any of my usual favorites, I do get to eat healthy food like this:  

Grilled Citrus Chicken with Cauliflower Mash and a salad with homemade Ranch dressing.  And almondmilk to drink.  So there.  It was all delicious, but an hour later I was staring into my cookie cupboard, mouth watering.  I've even stooped so low as to open a bread bag or a cookie jar and smell the inside. Free smells, right? 

Why do I do this to myself?

Once upon a time there was a girl who had health problems even though she was only 36.  Her hormones were messed up, her iron was way low, and she was tired.  Dead dog tired.  All. The. Time.  Not to mention the fact that 6 months after her last baby was born, she still looked lumpy in all her clothes.

So 9 days in and I do still crave sugar in a bad way, but here's what's getting better so far (the Whole 30 calls these "Non-scale victories"):

1. I'm just now beginning to get some energy back, and I hope it gets better and better. My family will thank me.  I get 8 hours of sleep at night (thank you, Lord!), and yet I was still thinking about napping almost constantly.  I wake up exhausted, and I go to bed exhausted, and there's pretty much just exhaustion all day.  It's been pretty bad, y'all.  Hopefully we're on the up-swing.

2.  I'm learning to cook.  REALLY.  I'm ashamed to say that since Eden was born, "cooking" had diminished to the point that I would maybe grill some chicken with bottled bbq sauce on it, make a package of blue box mac & cheese, and dump out a bag of pre-made salad.  Folks, that's not cooking.  On a program like Whole 30, none of those foods are compliant.  And so you relearn how to really cook real food with real ingredients and NO ADDED SUGAR. As you may be able to guess, cooking like this takes T-I-M-E. And planning. And actual ingredients, like fresh parsley and lemons.  It's been good for me.

I'll let you know at the end of this how it went! 21 more days to go...



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