I'm Coming Back
I'm sitting here at the computer with about a million other things to do; grocery store circulars waiting to be perused and marked, lessons waiting to be planned, rooms to be cleaned, laundry to be done, but I want to write instead. I think that's how I know that I'm coming back from wherever it was that I have been; I want to write.
The days slip past me fast/slow, and my boys are getting so big and I am missing it by not recording it. I've taken about 5 pictures in as many months, and guilt knocks on my door about that. But I'm not letting it in! I look back on my own childhood, and there certainly aren't pictures documenting every week in those dusty albums. Do I weep about that? No! So we press on.
"What do you want to remember?" I ask myself. These things:
That parenting is the hardest thing I ever begged God to have the privilege of doing. It is mind-numbingly, pain-stakingly, wits-end kind of hard. And I laugh because I had All The Answers before I had kids. And now I'm just pretty baffled most of the time, leaning on God for grace to not yell.
That God is so gloriously good and kind! One example: think of the many varieties of foods He has gifted us with! I marvel each morning that my cat is able to eat the same kibble day after day, and I get to choose from a bounty of goodness. I just came off of a Whole 30 diet, one more attempt to help my "issues" that I deal with on an on-going basis. That diet plan contains no sugar, grain, legumes, or dairy, and so you can imagine that food choices are pretty limited. Post-reintroduction, and I just marvel at the many varieties of foods that God gives us and allows us the pleasure of enjoying. Bread (oh, how I missed bread!), ginger cookies, cream, and yes; sugar just to name a few!
That homeschooling may be the best thing our family has done in a long time. I don't know why I ever thought I would hate it. Well, yes I do, but God has helped with every one of my objections. It's no secret that I was not a stellar student during my academic years. I liked school, I just wasn't that good at Math, Science, or History. And so. Now I have a child who is learning all those things that I have never been good at, and I get to re-learn it along with him! I'm auditing 3rd grade! :) We are studying Astronomy for science, and I'm learning all kinds of things I never knew. I got to help Noah make a solar system out of balloons! What could be better?
That Seth has probably given up naps for good. He keeps doing anything but nap when I put him down, and I'm trying not to let it stress me out. But it does anyway. I do love my quiet, and having a child threaten my quiet time at two years old puts me on edge. We have tried "quiet time" in his bed, but it's never very quiet, and inevitably involves me going in there at least twice. Not peaceful or restful at all.
That Noah, in his present state of tooth limbo (you know how life is at eight!), looks like a jack-o-lantern. (I had his permission to write that.) I should take a picture of at least that, since it reminds me so much of how I looked at his age. In fact, I dug out my 3rd grade school photo just for proof, and was surprised at how closely his mouth resembles mine at that age. Unfortunately for him, that will mean braces eventually (I haven't told him that yet. shhh!).
That Josh needs to win an award for putting up with me over the last several months. Seriously, I've been rough. He has put the kids to bed for me on occasion, been my voice of reason when I had none, listened to me cry, and reminded me of God's promises. I'm thankful for him!
Blogging is such a good outlet for me, and I hope to continue more faithfully than I've been able to lately!
The days slip past me fast/slow, and my boys are getting so big and I am missing it by not recording it. I've taken about 5 pictures in as many months, and guilt knocks on my door about that. But I'm not letting it in! I look back on my own childhood, and there certainly aren't pictures documenting every week in those dusty albums. Do I weep about that? No! So we press on.
"What do you want to remember?" I ask myself. These things:
That parenting is the hardest thing I ever begged God to have the privilege of doing. It is mind-numbingly, pain-stakingly, wits-end kind of hard. And I laugh because I had All The Answers before I had kids. And now I'm just pretty baffled most of the time, leaning on God for grace to not yell.
That God is so gloriously good and kind! One example: think of the many varieties of foods He has gifted us with! I marvel each morning that my cat is able to eat the same kibble day after day, and I get to choose from a bounty of goodness. I just came off of a Whole 30 diet, one more attempt to help my "issues" that I deal with on an on-going basis. That diet plan contains no sugar, grain, legumes, or dairy, and so you can imagine that food choices are pretty limited. Post-reintroduction, and I just marvel at the many varieties of foods that God gives us and allows us the pleasure of enjoying. Bread (oh, how I missed bread!), ginger cookies, cream, and yes; sugar just to name a few!
That homeschooling may be the best thing our family has done in a long time. I don't know why I ever thought I would hate it. Well, yes I do, but God has helped with every one of my objections. It's no secret that I was not a stellar student during my academic years. I liked school, I just wasn't that good at Math, Science, or History. And so. Now I have a child who is learning all those things that I have never been good at, and I get to re-learn it along with him! I'm auditing 3rd grade! :) We are studying Astronomy for science, and I'm learning all kinds of things I never knew. I got to help Noah make a solar system out of balloons! What could be better?
That Seth has probably given up naps for good. He keeps doing anything but nap when I put him down, and I'm trying not to let it stress me out. But it does anyway. I do love my quiet, and having a child threaten my quiet time at two years old puts me on edge. We have tried "quiet time" in his bed, but it's never very quiet, and inevitably involves me going in there at least twice. Not peaceful or restful at all.
That Noah, in his present state of tooth limbo (you know how life is at eight!), looks like a jack-o-lantern. (I had his permission to write that.) I should take a picture of at least that, since it reminds me so much of how I looked at his age. In fact, I dug out my 3rd grade school photo just for proof, and was surprised at how closely his mouth resembles mine at that age. Unfortunately for him, that will mean braces eventually (I haven't told him that yet. shhh!).
That Josh needs to win an award for putting up with me over the last several months. Seriously, I've been rough. He has put the kids to bed for me on occasion, been my voice of reason when I had none, listened to me cry, and reminded me of God's promises. I'm thankful for him!
Blogging is such a good outlet for me, and I hope to continue more faithfully than I've been able to lately!
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